The Contract
by Domenic
Summary: Transformers Prime AU collection of stories. The characters are all actors in their own series. Hijinks ensue.


**Title: The Contract**

**Part: wardrobe malfunction**

**Fandom: Transformers Prime**

**Summary: AU collection of stories. The characters are all actors in their own series.**

**A/N: A collection of stories on this topic. This'll be getting metasupernatural fast (let's see if that word sticks as making any sort of sense) because nella's awesome idea makes me think of the Roger Rabbit movie and other great things where they had the characters be actors and the fact that I want to also use the voice actors' roles for more plot and crossover and commentary; and I like shapeshifting, the fact that I think Megatron and Optimus would have a long history since G1 to TFP and how that affects their relationship, and full on rom com parody later on—but for now, just focusing on TFP. (Okay, the other stuff may be a 'maybe,' but differently TFP parody is a go.)  
**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Transformers Prime and the original plotbunny goes to nellasaur.**

"...Can you see your feet?" Megatron was the first to speak once Optimus finally shuffled out to present his new costume mods for season three. Up until then a number of the cast had stared in mortified shock, undoubtedly regretting their combined effort to get Optimus out of wardrobe to show them. No wonder their co-worker had been so hesitant.

"I...don't know," Optimus said, the thought never occuring to him before. He immediately looked down, trying to see—

The new thought and action was driven out of his head at the sound of a click, and Starscream's shocked indignant "_Soundwave_!"

"Statement: This will go online," Soundwave said, her screen-mask reflecting Optimus back before fading away.

Arcee rolled her eyes. "The Internet's gonna have a field day."

"I can see it already—'Robustimus Prime,'" declared Knock Out with a theatrical flourish of his arms, as if sizing up a sign posted above in neon lights.

"'Eater of the Forge of Solus Prime,'" Arcee added in, also with her own added theatricality, though more understated, arm on one hip and the other held out and presenting just so.

Starscream still looked indignant. "Can't he retain his dignity with the public until the episode actually airs?"

"And why should he be so lucky?" Arcee asked with an arched brow.

Knock Out beamed. "Didn't you hear? Last one with their dignity standing wins."

"Well, I'm out of the running," grumbled Starscream with a roll of his eyes.

The others regained the power of speech:

"You're supposed to fly in _that_?" Bumblebee asked, and she dared to finally touch, poke a digit at one of Optimus' new wings.

"Hardly looks aerodynamic," Ratchet muttered, joining in Bumblebee's inspection and beginning to prod Optimus, who took it stoically.

Bulkhead scoffed, "I was up and at 'em after the script said 'I'd never be the same again,' I don't think the showrunners really care about what looks 'aerodynamic.'"

"As long as it's 'bigger,'" muttered Shockwave, arms crossed.

"Yes," Ultra Magnus said, "'bigger is better, flashier'—it's _logical _for the showrunners to fall upon such a cliche—"

"Enjoy the joking while you can, you won't be doing much of that on stage," grunted Shockwave.

"It doesn't look very comfortable," Trooper Steve said, coming up closer to Optimus.

"All that poking probably doesn't help," added Predaking loudly, and immediately Bumblebee, Ratchet, and Starscream stopped poking Optimus.

Megatron shrugged. "It was amusing." He flashed a smirk at Optimus, who frowned.

Wheeljack just shook his head, muttering lowly. "Couldn't they just give him a ship like they gave me the Jackhammer?"

"And how would they explain that?" Smokescreen asked.

Wheeljack snorted. "Like they really explain how the Forge gives Optimus a body like_ that_..."

###

The cast was used to first takes not going well all the time. Going south, even. Way south.

The script called for Starscream to have better visual recognition, and he did; was the first to see things go off-script and immediatley think _scrap_ as Optimus came in way too fast and straight for him and _**oh scrap**_—

Megatron tackled Starscream out of the way, Optimus missing them and crashing alone.

"Are you all right?" Megatron asked as he picked himself off Starscream.

"Yes, yes, I'm fine—" Starscream said, nodding, nodding a lot, stopping when Megatron pulled him to his feet.

"Is everyone all right?" Optimus called, frantic and with one wing dented as Ultra Magnus helped him up.

"No one's hurt," Megatron called back. "You?"

"I'm—" Optimus winced as one wing fell completely off. "—fine."

And so a crewmember was fired.

###

The next time after repairs, Optimus crashed into Megatron, and in a tangled heap they checked the other was okay and apologized and tried to extricate themselves, and were onlly able to do it with Ultra Magnus pulling on Optimus while Starscream pulled on Megatron.

And another crewmember was fired.

###

After that Optimus didn't even make it to the platform, landing and bouncing not too far down in the safety net.

Watching off set with the other cast members, Knock Out muttered, "If this is the bosses' idea of a blooper reel, they're taking it a bit too far."

On stage, Starscream whirled on the director while Megatron and Ultra Magnus helped Optimus out of the net. "Seriously, don't you want to rethink the mods—" Starscream started and stopped, glaring as the director went on about the budget and such.

And one more crewmember was fired.

###

Optimus invited the fired crewmembers for drinks, and they talked, listened to each other.

"Starscream has told me that the _Legend of Korra_ is looking for people for their second season..."

**A/N: All right, ended up sneaking in a little bit of crossover at the end. It's Starscream that recommends **_**Legend of Korra**_** since his voice actor played Amon on that show (though Steve Blum won't be mentioned, but this is where shapeshifting and some crazy worldbuilding should come in later). The pronouns with Soundwave and Bumblebee aren't a mistake and should be explained more in-story later.**


End file.
